Skip to main content

Hair and old age

Lately I've lost my focus - at least my focus on the things I should be focusing on. Like life in my household. My husband. Things I need to be doing. Like finishing the novel I'm working on. I work everyday but not as much as I should. I'm busy focusing on, well see below.

My focus entirely is on a spot in my head where I'm losing hair.

You heard right. I have one small spot on the right side of my head, in the exact position where my head hits the pillow every night.

I can't get my focus off  that one spot. Wondering why I have it, how I got it. What to do about it. Questioning, will it get worse. Am I doomed to lose all my hair at this young age. Well, not so young but who wants to have a bald spot right on the side of their head at any age?

So instead of doing more important work, I think about remedies for my "balding" spot. Sure I can still cover it with hair. Am I going to be like those old guys who do comb overs? I hope not.  It's not entirely bald in that one spot either for which I am eternally grateful. I spend time in shops looking at hair products. Right now I'm using a shampoo for thinning hair. Don't know if it's helping but my hair smells wonderful, sort of a minty scent.

When we go out as we do most days, I have to ask R if my "spot" is covered. I drive him nuts checking my head. He always says yes yes yes. I know he's trying to appease me. And he always says my hair looks nice but can you trust a man you've been married to for 49 years? He's prejudiced. He still sees me as the young girl  he married, with loads of hair and a bounce in my step. Yeah yeah yeah.

I'm slowly driving myself wild with this hair thing. (Him too!) I've tried sleeping in other positions but no matter how I fall asleep in the middle of the night I'm back on that one spot, grinding the heck out of it. I'm a restless sleeper. I thought of wearing some kind of head gear but not sure that would be comfy. My mother wore a silk sleep cap. She was sure it kept her hair style nice for a longer period of time. I'm not sure but I did love seeing her in her pajamas and that funny sleep cap.

My husband wants me to go with the sleep cap. He remembers my mother's. I don't think that is the answer. I think the answer is to stop grinding my head against the pillow. I grind my teeth too. I wear a mouth guard.

Do they make any such thing as a head guard to keep one from grinding one's head on the pillow at night?

Who knows. My goal today is not to focus on my head, hair, bald spot. Myself in general.

I did do something the other day that has perhaps helped a bit. I did a home color job- semi permanent, a rinse on. I picked out a nice brown shade. It went on my head jet black. R was talking to our little granddaughter and he told her Nan was  painting her hair black and that had her worried. I had to assure her that was not true.

When I washed the color off my hair was dark auburn. For those who know me - auburn is not a color I've ever had. But it's different and I don't notice the spot as much. The color treatment itself has made my hair fluffier. Or is that all in my mind? No, I just tossed my head and it is indeed fluffier.

I'm off here to get my mind back on my novel. I have miles to go before I sleep. How about you, do you have some things you focus on that are not all that important in the grand scheme of things?

Here's to a great day. Blessings!


  1. Two recommendations:

    Try the shampoo Nioxin. It's for thinning hair. Go to website

    Secondly, I'd wear the hair cap. Then your hair won't break off when you sleep. My mom used to wrap toilet paper around her head at night to protect her "hairdo". In the morning her hair was perfect!

  2. Ohmigosh we must have been separated at birth! I will focus on something just like this and not let the point of obsession..and yes, after almost 30 years of marriage (this Aug) I don't trust my husband not to tell me just what I want to I ask my mom..or my teen-age that's veracity for ya!

  3. I feel your pain. I have the same problem, and I lost my eyebrows! I think losing the eyebrows is the worse part.

    I've heard the only thing that works is Minoxidil. I've not tried it - yet.

  4. I will try the hair cap. My adult daughters will fall on the floor laughing. I can laugh too as I know they'll someday head this way! Kids will always tell you the truth. Although I honestly think R believes I look good no matter how I look. I'll get out of bed in the morning looking like my hair went through a mixer and he'll say something about how nice I look. I think we're both a bit unhinged the older we get. Thanks for the great comments. I'm babying the eyebrows. They are not doing well either. God bless us all.

  5. I have the Sally's brand Nioxin and it's helping some already. Thanks for that tip, Pat.
    Let's all take better care of us.

  6. Loved reading this, & remembering Mamaw Ollie's sleep cap... I can still hear her rolling down the hall early in the morning in her wheelchair. Her wedding ring clanging on the metal wheel...I say if the sleep cap helps, I'm all for it! I hate to say it but at 37 I'm feeling my age and shouldn't be already! Your hair always looks nice. Love you Mom!!

  7. After abusing my hair for ten years ( once a year) withcommercial hair colours, I came to an understanding that gray is better than no hair. Like you daughter says your hair must look nice !
    So don't worry. My ER lady thinks that my gray hir make gray hair customers feel comfortable.

  8. I'm not sure how comfortable it'll be sleeping in a cap, so I have another suggestion. Have you ever tried satin pillow cases? They work well for not mussing hairdos while you sleep, (I used to use them years ago when I actually had some semblance of a "do") so they might help with your problem, as well.

  9. In the South, we grew up always hearing about sleeping with silk pillow cases...makes it more difficult for the hair to be against rough texture and caught to tear out.

    I just found your blog and enjoyed reading!


  10. Many thanks for all the tips. I'm going to try them all.
    Here's to a good night's rest and no worry about hair.
    Jeez. I need to grow up. Yes, gray hair is good too.

  11. Have you had a checkup to make sure you don't have a thyroid problem or something else that would make your hair thinner? Coloring does make your hair look and feel fuller...hope you find a happy solution!

  12. Yes, I'm under a dr.s care but thanks. I'm taking loads of supplements for my health. I was put to sleep three times recently and the meds for that often make hair come out. WHo knows?
    Many thanks.

  13. Hi Barb, I think you could write a good story out of all this. It sounds like you have got a lot of good suggestions, I will have to remember them if I ever get that problem. And, knowing me, I probably will sooner or later. Have a nice weekend. Hope to see you in June.

  14. Everytime I get my hair highlighted it makes it feel thicker--that's probably what happened to you. Have you been medically checked out as certain illnesses result in hair loss I've heard. OOps--just read your comment above:)

  15. Try a silk (or satin) pillow case, Barb. It's supposed to ease the stress on your hair and skin:) Oh, I see some of the gals mentioned that already. I was going to say Nioxin too, but that's been covered also. Wow! Everyone's on the (hair) ball. Sorry. Couldn't resist:)

    And me? I ALWAYS have focus problems. I too need to be working on the ms. But blog jumping is more fun:)

  16. I hope one of these remedies work soon for you so that your focus can return to your craft ... I like Janet's idea, too, to make a story out of this!

  17. Brilliant blog post. You have gained a brand-new fan. Pls keep them coming and I look forward to more of your interesting blog posts. I think it is definitely a good bet. You cannot go wrong with this. catalase


Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Dreaded School Pictures

This year when my children brought home their school pictures, I cringed. These kids can leave home looking cherubic, but the minute they pose for that school photographer they are transposed into unrecognizable beings. My middle daughter brought home pictures bearing her name and room number that couldn't have been my offspring. Nor a distant relative.
I had worked for hours on this child. Her hair was parted in the middle and drawn into a cute little ponytail over each ear. Even though she is at an awkward age, she looked adorable when she went out that door. Her missing front teeth only added to her charm. The kid in the picture has her mouth open wide displaying ugly dark gaps. Her one visible ponytail is lopsided, her part is uneven, and her bangs look like they were cut with pinking shears. I know this isn't my child because I always give my children a good haircut before they have their pictures taken. The only thing vaguely familiar is the sweater the child has on. My dau…

Building a story vs building a house

My latest book!

Dear Writer: 
Writing a story is somewhat similar to building a house. Or not!
Remember this:
when we give a piece of our story to someone to read - we expect them to see the whole.
It's like building a house and offering a single piece of lumber to another builder. “Here, see the house I'm building.” SOME CAN SEE IT AND SOME CAN’T. Here's the thing: MOST CAN'T.
This step is as necessary to me as breathing. 
I need to give you single boards as I create them. AND I expect you to be a visionary and say, “Why yes. I see.”  
I need you to see how special the piece of lumber is that I'm using and to see that eventually I'll add more pieces to make the whole. 
Choose people to read your work who like the kind of stories you write. 
There are as many kinds of stories as there are houses to live in. If you give a brick ranch to someone who only appreciates a cape cod then he'll have a hard time fitting himself into what you are offering.
Don’t rebu…

My Favorite Essay by Gladys Taber


From an essay by Gladys Taber
Family Circle  - September 1982

    I sat in the sun the other day while the dogs dug up the lawn and thought about work. I wasn’t working. I was just thinking about it. I have found that when I cannot possibly accomplish everything I am supposed to and feel an unbearable pressure---as all homemakers must---if I just stop, life goes better.
    I get a good book, make some spiced tea and sit down on my own corner of the sofa or in my favorite lawn chair. I let life settle in around me, and that is the only way I can express it. After 20 minutes or half an hour, I go back to the mechanics of living.  AND at days end I am just as far along as if I had not stopped to think.

Another of her thoughts: time for thinking is a gift one can give only to one’s self.

Hope you enjoy reading this as much as I have over the years. When I've had it with my life some days -  I have only to sit down with a glass of sweet tea and think of this essay an…