Why is it that some days we move forward and some backward?
As for me, I believe it's because I don't have a plan. Or I haven't this summer.
The days are flitting past like fireflies in the night, their illusive lights blinking, "Come - follow me."
And there I am running behind them - an imaginary Mason jar stretched out in my hand trying to catch each one. "Come back sunny days," I call, "so that I might use you as I planned all last winter when I lived beneath my cozy couch blanket."
This was to be the summer that I got things done. Great things! The summer of accomplishments!
I was going to rework one of my novels and make it into, well, into something other than what it is.
I was going to finish some short stories that had been languishing in the desk drawer.
I was going to get a natural tan, not too much, but just enough to not look sickly.
I was going to sit on the quilt my grandmother made in the shade of the big tree in our backyard and READ READ READ.
I was going to stretch out on that quilt and watch the sun make various leaf patterns on the blue sky, as a soft breeze swept through.
I was going to dream. Daydream like when I was a kid.
I was going to. I was going to. I was going to - move forward. And, maybe, some days I have.
But there have been more days that I haven't.
Some days I've just stood still.
Some days I've stood and watered the plants on the deck and watched the bug action in the soil. Watched how the plants absorb the liquid and watched how they come back to life.
I've spent more time with R than I'd planned due to some medical issues. We've laughed more. And watched more movies.
Moving forward and backward. And, sometimes not moving at all.
Maybe that's what this particular summer was meant for. Perhaps it was meant to have its own agenda.
For it surely has.
On my way to accomplishing what I thought I needed to, perhaps, I've accomplished some things unseen. Illusive, like the firefly. And it will unfold its truth to me as gently as the butterfly unfolds her wings. Slowly, maybe swiftly. But in her own time.
How's your summer going? Good bad or indifferent?
I'd like to hear from you. Always! Blessings!